Saturday, October 25, 2008

Levels of Fatigue

Tired.
Really Tired.
Over Tired.

Let's discuss.

I was tired yesterday. Actually, "tired" doesn't even begin to describe how tired I was. I was overtired. Have you ever seen a small child that is overtired, who is whining and crying and carrying on while throwing themselves on the ground but won't go to sleep? Yeah. That was me yesterday. Except I wasn't on the ground crying and carrying on. I wanted to. I did.

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But I was whining. I even got tired of listening to myself at one point and decided to just sit at my desk and not talk. But that made me want to just go to sleep. So I started whining again. It was a vicious cycle. My co-workers were very happy when the day was over.

Why all this tiredness? Well, I was barely going on 10 hours of sleep over 3 days. It's just not enough, people! At some point your body is going to revolt.

It started on day one as just being tired. I had stayed up until 2:00 a.m. to transition for night shift. I didn't sleep well for my afternoon nap...okay, not at all...so I was tired at work all night.

I got home and told myself I could only sleep a few hours because I had worked my night shift, but then had to turn around and work a day shift the next day. It's a complicated ordeal, trying to "trick" your body and mind through that transition. I tricked my body quite well. But I could not shut my mind off no matter how hard a I tried. Apparently my mind thought it needed to stay up for another night shift.

I got 3 hours of sleep before my alarm went off to get up for work. Then I was really tired.

I went home from work that day just knowing I was going to keel over if I didn't get some sleep. I was sleepy anyway, so I thought it wouldn't be a problem once my head hit the pillow. I shouldn't think about things. I should just do them. Thinking makes my head spin...and makes my brain work...and makes it impossible to shut down the thought process when I NEED TO BE SLEEPING, PEOPLE! It starts out innocently enough, that thought process when you are trying to go to sleep.

"Okay, self. If you fall asleep now you'll get a solid 7 hours."
"If you will fall asleep now, it will be a good 5 hours."
"You better fall asleep because you have to get up in 4 hours."
"You are screwed. You are only going to get 3.5 hours of sleep...assuming you can fall asleep right now."

I got another 3 hours of sleep. Yippee. Then I was over tired.

Yesterday was a struggle at best. I stood in front of my closet not being able to process a single thought about what to wear. I sat down in front of my dresser drawer to grab some jeans and almost fell back to sleep. So my attire yesterday was.... ummm... interesting. Thank God for casual Fridays. Although yesterday it could have very easily been Frumpy Friday and I would have won the award.

I've mentioned before that I work 12 hour shifts. So 12 hours when you are over tired is a struggle for anyone. I don't care who you are. I drank 4 cups of coffee in my first 2 hours of work. My stomach revolted. My eyes crossed every time I had to look at my computer screen. They were revolting, too. Dry, sore, itchy and bloodshot. My poor eyes just wanted to close themselves and NOT open anymore. Every muscle ached. Every movement took effort. And every activity my brain was required to process was like trying to reason with a drunk. A tired drunk.

An annoying, whiny, over tired drunk. That was me yesterday. Fun stuff.

I made it home, zombied through a bowl of homemade soup for dinner, and went to my bedroom. I took 2 Tylenol PMs and turned on the TV. I found something interesting that was to start at 8:00. It was 7:50. I don't ever remember the show starting, nor do I recall my husband coming to check on me and turning the TV off.

I woke up to the alarm at 4:20. Time for work.

And today? I'm just a little tired.

7 comments:

  1. Ugghhh...I SO know this feeling. I battle insomnia a lot. And when I go through those bouts, which usually last several days to a week, it is downright painful to make it through a day. I hope you can catch up soon, because that lack of sleep messes up everything. Sending you a hug and hopefully some extra ZZZZZs soon!

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  2. Oh Cheri-- that was my week. Meds, Benedryl, NOTHING helped this week-- and once you pass beyond tired, the funk sets in and you start shutting down! Here's to a better week for both of us!
    P.S. Love the hissy fit graphic!

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  3. Rotating shifts stinks. I don't know how you do it. I never felt rested no matter when or how long I slept.

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  4. Cheri I always wonder how the hell you do that shift work and work the family. I know I COULD NOT do it!! Hugs my girlfriend!!!

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  5. I am tired just reading your post!! And I am the same - the more tired I am, the busier my mind is and the harder it is to fall asleep! Hope you are well rested soon!!

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  6. man I'm tired just reading that. I feel like that little hissy fit icon all the time lately LOL

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  7. Oooh my poor lil Cheri! I'm glad you got that good nights sleep you needed!

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