Another Pryor Milestone

I've mentioned many times in the last two years how each of my family members is dealing with Cody's loss in their own, individual ways. Grieving is different for everyone. Troy and I lost a child. Nathan and Lindsay lost their sibling. Cody was also a grandson, a nephew, an uncle, a cousin and a friend to people I am still meeting 2 years after his death.

My surviving children have displayed varying degrees of grief and it is unique and different from the other even though the commonality is loss of their sibling. Their best friend. Their "let's do something sneaky behind mom & dad's back" partner in crime. But they have one thing in common in moving forward:  CAP's Pizza & Tap House.

We started this venture in a small way before Cody died. I've told that story before, but he and Nathan wanted to do something together and Nathan suggested a pizza joint. The rest of that story is floating around, but the bottom line is we decided to continue this pursuit without the 5th member of our family. Nathan dove in head first with the kind of gusto and determination that both made me proud and worried me at the same time. This grief was pretty fresh for all of us and I wanted to make sure he was dealing with it and not avoiding it by filling his life with the stressful job of opening a business. Not just a business. A restaurant.

Have I ever told you how stressful owning a restaurant is? No? Well, consider yourself informed.

Nathan did much of the leg work associated with the business side of things. He and his friends gutted and remodeled the inside of the restaurant and I nit picked over details associated with paint color and decor. We had issues with our business license and I thought Nathan would have a stroke as we almost didn't pass the final health inspection due to the placement of our huge pizza oven. We fought and argued and disagreed about many things leading up to our opening.

But we made it.

 My children are only in their 20's and a venture like this is huge, even for a seasoned business owner. Each of them has their own strengths they bring to the business. And it challenges them both equally on the parts of the job that is difficult for their personality type. But their focus and their goal is always the same: we are doing this for Cody.  And we continue to fight and argue and disagree about many things.

Like when/where to open a second location.

But my stubborn, driven, tenacious middle child went forth to conquer regardless of how uncomfortable I was with it. He had another reason to pursue this expansion.

Carly Ann Pryor

Best reason ever. I'm sure Cody approved from wherever he was looking down on us.

And so with all the tenacity of opening that first location, the hard work, long hours and sheer determination to prove to me it was possible, Nathan and his business partner Tyler opened up CAP's Pizza & Tap House in Stockton. Their grand opening was yesterday and it was a great success. And while it struck me in the gut that we were still a "-1" for this celebration, I found it fitting to take the picture where we did.

l to r: Troy, Cheri, Lindsay, Carly, Nathan and Carla

I'm so proud of my children and all they put in to this business. Their time, their love, their dedication. It does not go unnoticed.

Congratulations, Nathan! I know your brother would be proud.

(aka "the mom")

September....more than the end of summer

September is Suicide Awareness Month. I have to be honest and tell you that I was not fully aware that there was an entire month dedicated to this subject prior to July, 2016. And after that horrible call my family received about Cody I found myself talking about it all the time, not just the month of September. But some really incredible people reached out to me about the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and I've been involved in some degree since then.

"Involved in some degree...." seems like a strange thing to say since the degree to which I was impacted by my son's suicide was much grander than "some degree". We opened an entire restaurant in his memory. I'm still suffering from a broken heart and trying very hard to pull the pieces of my prior self back to together. Some of those pieces don't quite fit yet. It's a struggle. My whole family struggles with it in their own individual ways. But there are things I can do to help others while perhaps making sense of why I am in this horrible club that nobody wants to be a part of.

One of the things I became involved with was the Out of the Darkness walk that raises funds for AFSP in their mission to save lives, bring hope and help end the stigma associated with mental illness and depression. It is a sense of community, bringing people together for a reason that is heartbreaking and full of sadness. These walks are amazing and help in a small way to heal the wounds left behind in the survivors of suicide victims.The first year I participated I was numb. It was still very fresh and very raw. Last year I found myself hugging strangers along the walk who were participating in their first event, knowing their pain and sadness, but yet giving them a sense of hope that there is healing in the future. That it won't always feel this raw.

September 29 is the Sacramento chapter's "Out of The Darkness Walk" We will be there in our purple, "Team Cody Pryor", walking for change and hope. If you would like to join our team, please go to the link below and click "Join Our Team". Help us raise funds, join us on Saturday morning, or both....or simply make a donation. The love and support I get each year from my family and friends is always heartwarming and I'm certain it will be no different this year.

Thank you all for your support, love and encouragement over the past 2 years.

Team Cody Pryor